The Inspiration for My Book

5 years ago I never could have imagined the journey I was about to travel. I could never have imagined becoming an Author, Life Coach and Speaker.

I was in a relationship with my best friend, we knew and understood each other so deeply as we had similar childhoods with similar fathers in a similar business environment.

The signs were definitely there that things were not going well in our relationship. I told him he was replacing me with his commercial property buyer's agent and soon-to-be business partner. The plan was always to bring me into his building business and grow that together, unfortunately, he decided otherwise and made a series of decisions that led to the ultimate betrayal of any relationship... he cheated with his business partner.

The details of this time of my life shock those whom I've shared it with. My best friend changed overnight, it was Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, except he didn't return to Dr Jekyll and I hung on desperately waiting.

November 14 2019, I was accidentally confronted with the truth in our favourite restaurant as he was showing me photos of a business trip to South Africa to visit Richard Branson’s Safari. There it was, images and a video... on his phone and it was at that moment I had a breakdown and my whole world changed. It was a before-and-after moment, one of those moments where you just cannot go back.

All I could hear was my heart beating, it was so loud and the whole world froze, except for me. I was shaking as I was trying to process what had just happened, what I just saw and what it meant. My brain "broke" at that moment and I could barely function for many months, actually years. Later it triggered a chronic illness flare-up, Fibromyalgia, I wasn't aware I had it until my poor system couldn’t cope anymore.

At the time I had become the sole carer of my son as his father had an accident a few months prior resulting in him becoming quadriplegic. My beautiful 8-year-old son's heart was broken. He also has Down Syndrome, so it was a lot to deal with and we needed my partner more than ever, instead, he not only abandoned us but destroyed me when my baby needed me the most.

Through the experience of the following years, I learnt first-hand about trauma, PTSD, CPTSD, generational trauma and the nervous system. I also found that the books I picked up to help me were either triggering or too information-heavy for me to process. I needed something simple, future-focused, practical and with a kind compassionate tone.

I figured out how to heal on my own, but it took longer than it needed, so I decided to write the book I needed at the start of this unexpected chapter of my life. It's kind of a love note to my past self, someone who I have deep affection and compassion for. I'm very protective of her and she has a space in my heart where I hold her with the safety she so desperately needed and deserved.

Self-publishing my first book has inspired me to create more and I plan on producing more products that make a positive impact on women's lives. I also need this as a creative outlet. I'm designing the life I want.

In addition to self-publishing books, I'll also be coaching and creating a program based on 'How to Heal From Toxic Relationships'. My purpose is to help as many women as I can navigate a devastating and heartbreaking time in their lives. To help them let go of and rewrite their past so they can reimagine and rebuild a life that they love... that's in alignment with their soul.

To spread the word as far as possible and to foster an authentic connection with my readers and potential ones, I will compliment this with speaking and events. I feel this is where I'm meant to be, it feels where I belong. I believe women are craving connection with the sisterhood, to find other women and a community where they feel embraced.

Today is our anniversary, it would have been 12 years together (9 September 2024). I miss the man he was before everything started falling apart. I miss that version of him terribly. It's ok to feel that and still move on to reimagine a life you once could never have imagined. It's the duality of life.

On the other hand, I really love this version of me. She jumps at opportunities and experiences even if she's on her own and she feels comfortable doing it. She's confident just as she is, sovereign in her mind, body, heart and soul. She's intentionally building a life in alignment with her heart... whatever makes her feel fulfilled and puts a smile on her face. She feels oh so lucky to be "independently owned and operated". It's all on her terms now and the sky is the limit.

I went through hell and back a few times over the last 5 years, it's taught me a lot and it's inspired me to make positive changes in the lives of other women.

To purchase the book 'How to Heal from Toxic Relationships' https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CVPZCYP4