Progress Over Perfection
Getting it done despite my fears.
The reason for my challenge to commit to a post a day for 30 days is to get past my fears and rebuild trust in myself that I can fulfil a commitment.
We all have these fears within that limit our potential, some so subtle we might not realise. My fears with this project include not sticking to my commitment ie. failing myself again, I’ll have nothing to say or share, nobody will read it, I won’t make any progress, my brain won’t work, what if what I write doesn’t read well or make sense?, I’ll get bored and stop then look like a failure… “oh there she goes again, switching what she’s doing”.
I have all of the excuses, I have more important things to do, I’m tired, my body hurts, it’ll be hard the days I have my son, etc. I can make them as I go. This time, I’m focused on the reasons over the excuses.
I also have all the reasons to do it!
It will help my brain start up again, my thinking will improve, I’m practising my craft every day, I will start to build a following, my message will become clearer, I’ll find out what resonates with readers, I feel like I’m a real writer now, I’m going to have so much content for next month’s challenge (yes that’s already in my mind), I’ll finally figure out how to use Substack! I’m following my passion and most of all, I feel fired up and a sense of urgency in a way that I haven’t for many many years and it feels so good!
This is what I’m meant to do. I don’t know what my message is yet or how I’ll get it out to the world, but I know this is where I’m meant to be.
Over the last 5 years I’ve broken my trust many times, I’ll do this or that and create a plan, etc. Even though the reason I didn’t complete what I started was mostly due to my health, it still wasn’t how I was used to being. I finished what I started. I achieved what I put my mind to and now I couldn’t. It didn’t matter to me the reason was my health, I failed. Those were my thoughts for a few years, until I started to love myself and talk to myself with kindness and understanding… just as I would any best friend.
These posts are not strategic, they’re not meant to be. They’re meant to be the flow of my thinking process on anything random that pops into my head between today and tomorrow. This practice is about rebuilding trust in myself, and showing myself I can commit to something again. It feels rather self-indulgent right now and I guess it is, I’m writing purely for me. It’s possible some of my writings won’t make any sense. I know after this practice I would have learnt and imprinted new thought processes to support the next stage.
A lot of us simply need to get out of our way and let the universe flow through us, just like in one of my favourite quotes (I replace Christ with Universe).
I am a hole in a flute
that the Christ’s breath moves through–
listen to the music.
~Hafiz
How beautiful… Maybe I’ll write more about this quote and concept in another post.
I still have other practices I’m blocked with regarding commitment, namely my daily yoga practice has been playing on my mind for at least a year. My beautiful yoga mat lies in my meditation area waiting for me to return. I know the fear, that I’ll do a pose that triggers Fibromyalgia pain… I know it’s a trauma response. This is why I’ve been unable to fulfil that commitment, even though I’ve tried numerous times. My pain and symptoms this year are greatly reduced, it’s incredible to me. I will try again… soon. Yoga is so precious to me, I started Yoga Teacher Training as I want to live by the yoga framework. I can feel bubbling back to the surface and I will work on this very soon as my life pieces itself back together.
Now it’s your turn….
What has been playing on your mind lately that you can start today or in the next few days or week?
What fears are limiting you? Look deeply.
What are the positive reasons for you to commit to your project?
How will it feel to you?
What is the commitment you’ll make to yourself?
Written in 37 mins…. I’ve got to get quicker!